Got your email yesterday. I have been unable to sleep, too.
The nights expand and contract, and sometimes I hear the waves.
All in all, I am doing okay. I try to take it slow. The desert heals.
Not in some wishy-washy way. Something out here takes over
Your soul. Even so, I miss all the music back home. Tell Harry
I said hello. Tell her that I am all right. The desert life, the quiet,
And the new companionship has done me well. I am stripped
Of all my impurities. Of all things untrue. I am growing young.
Soon, I will be inside the womb of the sun. Soon, I will be inside
The light. No more worn-out clothes, no more desperation. No more
Waiting for her plane to land, spotting her amongst arrivals. I'm sorry,
By the way, for taking love away from you. You made it so easy.
Mama always said to leave folks happier than how I found them.
Which is why I knew I had to leave. One more way to ease her mind.
I still dance sometimes. But I don't dance for just anyone. No, sir.
I’ve opened my windows to let in the wind and sorrow, the comings
and goings of our mutual owls, the crooked fingers that cannot point.
I’ve gone astray into the hollow sun and tumbled down into the arroyo.
Another lonely child of the earth who won’t yield to honeybells,
Or crows crash-landing at his naked feet. The stones have chosen me,
The hills have chosen me. I have sought in their crags the echoes
Of the hunters, of eternal nights of white wheels spinning out.
In wild dreams, I come to my deathbed scene: a warm hand in mine,
A suspicion of lilacs, violets, and lilies. You’re not there, and that’s fine.
I hope Harry is dreaming. I hope you have forgiveness in your heart
For the one who could not move an inch without blowing up the works.
In another life, we are ex-lovers running into each other all the time.
In another life, we are throwing sticks and stones onto the tracks.
But I am alone here—even with my new companions. How long
Does it take to get alone in this world? Come visit and discover.